silence is golden

or merely tarnished bronze?

sunrise beckons
world to yawn
slowly stretching
smoke, steam signals start
day dawns

whining rubber
caresses cold asphalt
flickering cold lights fade
is that all?

back where i belong

when you tossed on your bed in the cold light of dawn
when you paused for a second when you heard our song
when you felt once again that you just don't belong
did you miss me?

were the feelings you had
like the ones that i felt
the pain of withdrawal
the sting and the welt

now i'm back and i hope that things are as they were
that life hasnt passed it was more than a blur
i turn my face to tomorrow the past still with me
scars and stars fade in the the light of day

if i loved you less would you still love me more
youre all that i want stay with me i implore
just a minute longer just a day wont you please
dont take my sunshine without it i freeze

I'm running

running for my life
running for cover
running away
running home
running back
running uphill
running on empty
running dry
running hot
running blind
running deep
running along
running here and there
running over
running into
running around
running into the darkness
running towards the light
running to the one you love....
....think mostly i'm doing the last one

Today isn't Someday

Today isn't Someday (but it is getting closer and its back on the horizon. a shining beckoning beacon drawing ever nearer). Today is just a monday, cold, wet as a puppies nose. Its the kind of day that makes you almost want to pull the covers tight and just let the minutes wash over you, a roadspray of time if you will. So why in hell am I up in the pre-dawn hours tapping out my four fingered snippet of idle thought? Its pretty simple really. I'm in love.

Oh I heard that faint sniggering and yes I know you've got a point, that being that I am always in love. And to be fair I suppose I have been. Just didn't know that she loved me back. Well now I do and there is no doubt about it, shes made it quite clear. Even the thick-headed like myself can pick up on that. It could be the way she says it about eleventeen times a day, or the words she writes to me or the way she talks to me on the phone and ya they all sort of indicate something is there. Mostly its just in the feeling that I get from her in the indescribable radar love that only true lovers seem to possess.

So you're going to have to excuse me if I'm a little scattered or if I appear disconnected, out of it shall we say. Its just love and I'm in no hurry to change it.

It isn't Someday, not yet.....but it sure doesn't feel like monday either.

I love you baby.

drama

when youre in the seat
plushly upholstered safe and apart
contempt scornful blithely amused
unaffected by affairs of the heart

but thrust on the stage
spotlights burning
laughter faded
lovelife spurning
polaroid colour washes to black
she is where she cant go back
hopes gunned down
love lies bleeding

two hurt? must be them. i can't feel anything so i must be fine

make a hella good song tho
ending with the empty hiss of an old record going round and round

henley once sang
already gone

from where it was to where it is or isn't

turns out i could have saved the ink

The week that was

Its been a strange week, the week that was. The beginning of it so painful, the thought more real, more solid everyday that something was wrong. Something terribly, horribly wrong. Had she left? Or been taken? The choice hers to make? Or simply forcefully removed? I sat bathed in silence heart growing heavier wishing against wish. Every passing day like that of a searching relative or friend, hope fading slowly.
Then the words of a friend. Only a few typewritten simple words and my heart lept. She was still Alive...and more to the point so too was her love. I reread the words over and over again trying to force from the screen some clues as to how and where. Sadly when the window closed, the blinking cursor on the blank screen accused me of not doing enough, of having blown my chance, of not saying how I truly felt.
You can send an ilu down a conduit but unless it is very straight and unimpeded your message arrives jumbled mumbled static laden words, the message there, the urgency gone.
Like so many other times I checked where messages might be posted. It reminds me of again looking for the lost soul, hoping for a sign. Something that will tell you how they are and how you might contact them. And today not one, not two but three. Words I didn't even dare to hope that I would see again. And there they were, real as life.
Adrenalin rush, I read it all twice, and again. I had to write her back. So now I am. More, so much more to say later.
ILU.
That'll do for now.